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The operator, in a calm and soothing voice says: One day three football fans got into heaven, a Buccs fan, a Vikings fan and a Packers fan don't ask how the Viking fan got in. He walks over to the table, sets the picture in the middle and the table erupts. At any given moment on a sideline, someone probably is relieving himself while hiding in plain sight. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.
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Charles Woodson: A Poster Boy for Packer Ageism? — Part 2

All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The team that catches the most fish at the end of the week wins. Philadelphia Eagles Bears Panthers I follow football more closely than the typical, average fan. If it happens on the road in Tennessee against the Titans and no one is around to watch it, does it really happen? No shuffle up top as the four highest-ranked teams are coming off byes. Females are using a date rape drug called "beer" to target unsuspecting men. Houston Texans Rams Chiefs Kansas City has stayed surprisingly competitive this year with the Regression Monster looming in the distance.
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Stephen Tulloch Articles, Photos, and Videos - Chicago Tribune

Bears fans in Green Bay: Packer fans obviously would prefer the first scenario, and that's the one I'm going to side with. When Woodson retires at the end of this season, figure on him being one of the quickest inductees to the NFL Hall of Fame in recent history. Talk about a shitty matchup of teams no one outside of their geographic area cares about. Without a doubt, this is the best contender against Browns-Titans for the worst game on the slate. It's a little different though; you wear it and the other guy scores.
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New York Giants 49ers Rams All the talk in San Francisco this season has been off the field issues—namely bungling their domestic violence issue and the schism between the front office and Jim Harbaugh. Harrell had a biceps injury as a rookie, and is now having problems with his back. Did you hear that the Post Office has recalled all the Viking commemorative stamps? When it comes to head-to-head combat, the team with more consistent offensive drives will win. The Blitz Beer president replies, "Well, if you guys aren't drinking beer, neither will I. Before he could release his arrow, his friend pointed at a funeral procession passing on the road below their stand. Can Aaron Rodgers maintain the Lambeau mystique that Favre built?
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